THE FOLLOWING ARE ACTUAL STATEMENTS FOUND
ON INSURANCE FORMS WHERE CAR
DRIVERS ATTEMPTED TO SUMMARIZE THE DETAILS OF
AN ACCIDENT IN THE FEWEST
POSSIBLE WORDS. THE INSTANCES OF FAULTY WRITING
SERVE TO CONFIRM THAT
EVEN INCOMPETENT WRITING CAN BE HIGHLY ENTERTAINING.
-Coming home I drove into the wrong house and
collided with a tree I don't have.
-The other car collided with mine without giving
warning of its intention.
-I thought my window was down, but I found it
was up when I put my head through it.
-I collided with a stationary truck coming the
other way.
-A truck backed through my windshield into my
wife's face.
-The guy was all over the road. I had to swerve
a number of times before I hit him.
-I pulled away from the side of the road, glanced
at my mother-in-law and headed over the embankment.
-In an attempt to kill a fly I drove into a telephone
pole.
-I had been shopping for plants all day and was
on my way home. As I reached an intersection a hedge sprang up, obscuring
my vision and I did not see the other car.
-I had been driving for forty years when I fell
asleep at the wheel and had an accident.
-I was on the way to the doctor with rear end
trouble when my universal joint gave way causing me to have an accident.
-As I approached an intersection a sign suddenly
appeared in a place where no stop sign had ever appeared before. Iwas unable
to stop in time to avoid the accident.
-To avoid hitting the bumper of the car in front
I struck a pedestrian.
-My car was legally parked as it backed into
another vehicle.
-An invisible car came out of nowhere, struck
my car and vanished.
-I told the police that I was not injured, but
on removing my hat found that I had a fractured skull.
-I was sure the old fellow would never make it
to the other side of the road when I struck him.
-The pedestrian had no idea which way to run
as I ran over him.
-I saw a slow moving, sad faced old gentleman
as he bounced off the roof of my car.
-The indirect cause of the accident was a little
guy in a small car with a big mouth.
-I was thrown from my car as it left the road.
I was later found in a ditch by some stray cows.
-The telephone pole was approaching. I was attempting
to swerve out of the way when I struck the front end.